hey there, little wallflower…

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I see you.
I know, I know. You wonder if anyone does, really does. But I do. ‘Cause I’m in a corner, too. I can see you from across this crowded room, jam-packed with people, stuffed like sardines, and I stare at you.
In your face I see mine.
In your heartbeat I hear mine.
In that smile you wear…well, Miss Mirror of Myself, it’s mine.
I’d like to come over and say hi to my fellow wall-flower, but there’s a part of me perfectly content tugging on the strap of my purse, holding my glass of water in the other hand, silent, watching.
It’s times like these we wish we had an invisibility cloak, isn’t it? Not because we wish to hide our awkwardness, but because we would rather be invisible than anyone think we are feeling awkward.
But that’s more than I would ever say to you or you would ever say to me, isn’t it? I think I’ll stay here a while longer, watching, culling ‘research’ for my writing. You, too? See, I said we had a lot in common.
Oh, I saw that. I saw that girl walk by you and say hi. And I saw your mouth form the word and only a croak come out. So been there. Why is hi such a hard word to say? Why do our vocal chords rebel against us saying it? Any ideas? I’d love to hear ’em. You probably do know. You look like you have it all figured out.
You’d laugh at me if I told you that, wouldn’t you? But you do. It’s true. You look like you have it all figured out, as if the glass pearls have all been strung to the perfect pattern. You look poised and intelligent and all those things I feel inside (or not) but never seem to appear. And elegant. Oh-so-elegant you are, as if you are standing in the corner because you want to, as if you would rather (lovely word, rather) smile out at the crowd than join it.
Your hair is lovely and so’s your smile. Your smile almost says hi for you, doesn’t it? That word so full of potential and possibility and perhaps-we-shall-be-friends. Why do we fear it so, us girls in the corners? At least when it’s us saying it first…
I think it’s because everyone else says it so much better, so much more naturally. When you croaked hi…
yeah, that’s what I do, too.
Although I wonder, if every time half the people in this room say it, they hear a croak, too? They feel awkward, too?
And even if they don’t, perhaps, perhaps, they’ve all held the wall up before, stationed themselves in a corner before…
Hmmm…that thought just might…
Yes, yes, it does, it plants a tiny seed of courage in me and I think…
yes, I think…
I’m going to walk over to you now.
And say hi. 
 
(Please croak back.)
~*~*~*~
To all you pretty little wallflowers out there ::shy smile::
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